23 November 2011
00:13
I should have post this yesterday but am too tired....
Hey baby,
Last night didn't write to you cause I am literally with you… I can just talk to you. :) I thought we're suppose to draw line… Where's your line, baby? I did draw… When I hold back...you keep coming back… Why? If really follow your character...even though the whole world collapse and you're alone, you will not bother to catch hold of that person whom you've draw line with...especially those who had been in a relationship with you before… but baby… Why? Why you keep coming back to me? You know I still have heart for you. My heart still beating for you… What do you want from me? Are you engulf by loneliness since I really left? You warned me to stop bugging you, don't ever contact you… no calls, no sms… But you breached them all… You come back to me when I'm about to let you go…
I really doubt if you have been reading my blog… It seems like you know I'm backing off somehow… You start to come close to me again… Although right now, you're sitting right in front of me.. I really don't know what reaction to give you… Thus, I just keep quiet… When you're sick, you thought of me… You need someone to care for you… You need someone to be there for you… I know I still have a place in your heart. It's just that you're not admitting it. Your mum just give you a suggestion to look for me but you can actually ignore them.. It's not like you haven't stay alone before… When everytime, I worried about you...You'll tell me off saying that you're old enough to take care of yourself. But why you come back into my arms again luke warm? I can be very ignorant towards you if I wanted too...but I just couldn't. Especially today, when I told you that I might not wanna stay with you tonight… You got real surprise cause you never thought that I would say something like that. Then you used your mum phrase on me saying that your mum asked me to take care of you while she's away…
When I really reluctantly reply you, you finally let the cat out of the bag and said that you wanted me to stay for the night… I just want to hear it from you… When you said it, I know I'll have to sort out my mum who'll be alone tonight. You asked why am I late, and I told you the reason… From your tone and manner, I know deep down in you… you are really touched. But you just gulp it in your feeling… You like having me around but you're just too afraid to love again… I really wished that you'll stop playing games with my heart.. I eventually don't know how to react to you anymore… Though I love you very much...but I guess there should be a time when you should really learn that love is not something that you can keep and throw whenever you like…
I love you a lot but please give me back some dignity… I'm not some kind of fool that you can treat like a toy… I have feelings too… A feeling that you'll never know and understand cause you never try to know me with your heart…
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